Copy New Year!

31 Dec

The senseless noisy silly celebrations of yet another new year has started all over the planet. Millions will get drunk mindlessly, shake their body shamelessly to non-stop cacophony, shovel plates of atrociously priced food into their bowels & keep on wishing many more millions pointlessly.

Tomorrow morning the Sun will rise without a reminder, just like it did today & billions of days before, to keep Life going on this planet. Flowers will bloom; trees will sway & offer shade; birds will chirp & flap their wings; ants will crawl in a disciplined line to gather food; strays will roam the streets looking for food; cows will wait patiently near medians for speeding idiots to race past them; ceaseless waves of the ocean will continue to kiss the shore; prayers will be offered at temples, churches, mosques, gurudwaras & other places of worship; RaGa’s earthquake will not bother to disturb the Richter scale; neighbour will double the chance of you getting stricken with cancer by blowing second hand smoke from his balcony nonchalantly; over half of the Divided States of America will pray for armageddon to happen before Jan 20; AIADMK white brigade will pride themselves on being herded by a brand new mini amma; Stalin will continue to wait for his nanogenarian father to hand over the DMK baton; Akhilesh Yadav will continue to marvel at his incredulous father’s irrational attachment to his uncle; selective secularists will continue to wait for the next opportunity to pounce on NaMo worshippers, while sipping their wine or chai in british era clubs; black money hoarders will offer expensive gifts to bankers to convert their stash beyond the legal deadline that has already passed; Google will have another enchanting doodle; ACT fibernet will continue to be dead, almost a month after Vardah; TV channels will continuously broadcast death, despair & destruction 24×7; none of the Hollywood copycats & wannabes here will make a single decent movie that a global audience can watch & cheer, yet our movie makers who think too highly of their limited skills will wonder why they still couldn’t get an Oscar; all sports other than cricket will continue to starve for sponsorship; gyms & slimming clubs will gleefully sign annual contracts, knowing fully we’ll they don’t have to sweat it out after a few days; rich spoilt brats will drive their ultra-expensive imported cars in drunken stupor & kill a few platform dwellers, and walk away unscathed; Urjit Patel will conjure up his umpteenth DeMo rule, to amend the one announced yesterday; NaMo will wake up at 4am, do yOgA & head for another day at work to make this once-great nation great again; invariably all the hotels – especially the ones with a bar, Ola, Uber & the like will relish their most profitable day of the year, and will eagerly await the next such silly celebration day.  

You’ll wake up either a bad hangover or aching hips & knees or upset stomach or all of them & yell at someone for the misery you’ve created yourself. And signal the glorious start of yet another year of your wretched existence, which isn’t going to be any different from the previous one. 

Yet, you’ll expect everyone to wish you a “Very happy, healthy,… blah.. blah.. blah.. New Year” on all the social media apps & over phone, if not in person, and will respond to only those who wish you & make a note of those who don’t, adding that wrath to your already dump yard like karmA pile.

Bejan Dharuvala, Peter Vidal, Vamanan Namboodiri, AMR & Shelvee will assure you that at least 50% of your new year will be wonderful, which is exactly what they predicted for every new year, for everyone who cares to read their prediction. 

Swamy will once again re share his previous blogs like “Wish you Will” on this topic to remind you of the utter pointlessness of this abject stupidity & not respond to anyone’s wishes, which will continue to pour unabated from all & sundry anyway. Of course, not many will bother to read those blogs, again. 

As far as Swamy is concerned, there are only two days worth even thinking about – the day the Sun fails to show up in the morning & the one when it forgets to leave in the evening. In case of the former, we’ll all perish by freezing in a new ice age & in the latter we’ll probably burn & still perish.

Either way, there won’t be a planet anymore that inhabits a species that gloats so much about its extra sense over all other beings & still manage to screw up the only planet they’ve got to exist. As if their miraculously continuing existence itself, even for one more day, isn’t a celebration, they’ll hilariously – and very noisily – continue to celebrate some silly day or anniversary, pretty much every other day of the year. Every year. 

Celebrate like automatons trapped in The Matrix, without pausing to ponder even for a moment, if they’ve actually changed anything within themselves, in all these years, each of which offered at least 365 brand new days to ignite some change & appreciate the magnificence of creation all around in myriad forms, sizes & hues. And take at least a few baby steps to know the purpose of Life.

Celebrate yet another Noisy, Egocentric, Weary, Yappy, Eco-unfriendly, Arrogant, Ridiculous Copy New Year. BAUHumbug!

~Swamy

@PrakashSwamy 

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2 Responses to “Copy New Year!”

  1. Psy January 3, 2017 at 10:19 am #

    Seems an emotional print.
    Why swamy lost its temper ?

    • Psy January 3, 2017 at 10:20 am #

      Its*
      his

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